Trust in Me (Saved #1.5) Page 9
“Yeah.”
“What did you do, bro? It must have been something bad since she kicked you out of your bed.”
Do I even want to tell him? Knowing Bo, he will gloat about how he was right. “It’s complicated.” Bo glowers at me. On second thought, maybe he can help me. “I’m probably going to hear you say ‘I told you so,’ but I could use your help. Heather tried to blackmail me. Around midnight she called my phone and threaten to blast the pictures on the internet if I didn’t show up at her house in ten minutes. So, I go and it turns out, she wants me to leave Cassie for her. She showed me the pictures and I wanted to throw up, Bo. They were from the night you found me passed out drunk with Heather.
“I told Heather she can kiss my ass and left. Cassie was awake when I come back and as I was explaining to Cassie where I had been and why Cassie informed me she already knew about the pictures because Heather sent them to her. Cassie believes something more happened between Heather and I and since I can’t remember most of that night, I can’t prove to her I didn’t sleep with or kiss Heather. Cassie wanted to be alone, saying she was going to sleep on the couch, but I told her I would instead.”
Bo’s smile fades into a frown. “I really want to say it, J, but I won’t since you are already hurting enough.” Well, that’s a relief. “But you are in a mess.” No, shit Sherlock, I think to myself. “I will do everything I can to help prove you didn’t, J, but you owe me since I was right.”
“Fine, whatever, I just need your help.”
Cassie emerges from our room, her eyes puffy and red. Shit, she’s been crying. Jerking upright, I throw the cover off of me and stand when Bo hugs her. “Good morning, Darlin.” She smiles weakly at him. “Hungry? My nephew needs all the nutrients he can get.”
“What makes you think it’s a boy?” Cassie’s sass is not there, which means, something is wrong.
“There is no way it could be a girl, Cassie,” Bo says as a matter of factly. As Bo and Cassie talk back and forth about why it isn’t a boy or a girl, I watch her body language. A gut feeling has me watching her closely.
Not only is Cassie’s whole body tense, her hand is closed in a fist, and her face scrunches slightly as if she is in pain. Her whole demeanor is uncomfortable.
“Cassie,” I call her name, interrupting her and Bo’s conversation. “Are you hurting?”
When her gaze drops to the floor, I get my answer. “A little,” she murmurs.
Using my index finger, I tilt her gaze back up to me. “How long has this been going on?” I ask in a soft voice.
“Since a little while after you came out here.”
I scoop her up in my arms. “We are going to make sure the baby is okay. I assume you are hurting in your stomach right?” She nods, then lays her head on my shoulder. “Why didn’t you come get me?”
“It was only a slight pain up until an hour ago. I kept thinking it will go away.”
She should have come woke me up. “If this happens again, don’t wait, Cassie.”
“I’m coming with you and I’m driving,” Bo says, racing to his truck.
With Cassie not having a doctor down here yet, Bo drives us to the nearest labor and delivery.
Bo pulls up to the front to drop us off so we can head in while he finds a place to park. With Cassie in my arms, clinging to me, I walk as fast as I can to the elevator. The button has already been hit since there is a couple standing next to us, waiting.
“I’m scared, J,” Cassie whimpers.
I’m not going to lie, I’m scared shitless, too. Kissing her forehead, I step into the elevator when it opens. “The baby is going to be okay, Cass.” She closes her eyes and her hand fists my shirt.
The next hour is filled with waiting, questions, and finally an ultrasound, which was the highlight of our visit. For the first time, I get to see my baby. Cassie is bleeding slightly which not only concerns us but the doctor, as well.
While our baby is okay, we are not out of the woods yet. Cassie is on strict bed rest until told otherwise. She is only able to get up to go to the bathroom. That’s it.
When I asked the doctor what could have caused the pain she mentioned a few reasons, but the one that stuck out to me was excessive stress. After everything going down with Heather over the last few days, it seemed to have taken a much bigger toll on Cassie than I noticed. And I am to blame for all of it.
I call Bo when we are outside where he dropped us off. “I got food!” Bo announces as I help Cassie in. Cassie is in the truck no more than a second before she is scrambling out. I hold her hair back for her as she vomits on the sidewalk.
“It’s the bacon,” Cassie informs me as I hand her some napkins to wipe her mouth with.
“Bo!” I scold, sticking my head inside the cab. “Get rid of the bacon.”
A horrified look crosses his features. “Something is seriously wrong with your kid if he doesn’t like bacon!”
“Just eat it so we can go! Cassie needs to be resting! And get the smell out!”
Bo grumbles as he scarfs down the bacon and sprays some cologne he keeps in his truck. When I’m satisfied with the results, I lift Cassie back in the truck and hop in after her. All I want to do is hold her and apology profusely for placing all of this stress on her and our baby.
I need to fix this mess I have created. And fast.
Despite the rift between us, J has been constantly by my side since I have been placed on bed rest. It’s not easy for me to act like things are okay and go through the motions as if I am not hurting.
Bo is sitting in the living room with me, watching TV, keeping me company while J is helping his dad. I’ve got a doctor’s appointment later, which I am excited about. Maybe she can tell me that I can do more than lay around.
It’s been two months since my fight with J and with each day that passes, I worry if J will grow tired of trying to fix things and leave.
“Bo, can I ask you something?”
Bo turns off the TV as if he expected me to talk to him. “Shoot, Darlin’.”
“That night when you found J with…her, do you-do-I guess what I am asking is, did they hook up?”
“Darlin’, even drunk, J wouldn’t sleep with a slut like her. In fact, he even told her those very same words once. J didn’t sleep with Heather; I know that for a fact. I’m positive he hasn’t kissed her nor has he touched her. My brother is so in love with you, Cassie.”
His words play over in my head, causing tears to brim my eyes. “I was so hurt when I saw those pictures, Bo, and I was angry that he was drunk and on top of that he claimed he couldn’t remember most of the night. I kept thinking, “How can he prove he didn’t?””
“We are brothers Cassie, which means we look out for each other and have each other’s backs. I knew he was drinking more than usual that night, but I kept my eye on him. If Heather ever approached him, he’d either walk away or tell her off.”
The tears spill over, gliding down my cheeks. “I’m so stupid for being mad at him,” I sob.
Bo kneels beside the couch and pulls me to his chest. “Darlin’, he’s hurting. Let this go and reconcile with, J.”
Nodding, I bury my face in my hands. I knew in my heart J wouldn’t do that to me, but then a picture of them together would flash in my mind and leave me conflicted.
“I’ll call him and tell him to come home, Cassie, all right?”
Bo leaves me to call J. Anticipation sets in, kicking my heart into overdrive.
It only takes J five minutes to get home. “Cassie, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” Dropping to his knees next to me, he cups my cheeks and thumbs away the tears.
“I’m so sorry for being mad you,” I cry, leaning into him. “Please forgive me, J. I was so mad that night, but I shouldn’t have waited two months to let it go.”
“Calm down, Cassie,” he murmurs. “I’m so glad you finally realized I wouldn’t do that to you.” Even covered in dirt and sweat, he still takes my breath away. “I love you so much,
Cassie.” J rocks me as I murmur “I’m sorry” over and over.
J pulls back and captures my mouth for a breathtaking kiss. “Always believe that you are the one for me, Cassie. If you ever left me, the sun would not rise. Not being able to sleep next to you or to hold you like I want is killing me.”
“From now on, I will go with my heart, J.”
“I’ll always be honest with you, Cassie. Just trust me, okay?”
“Always,” I murmur as I lean in to kiss him once more.
J and I received good news from the doctor. Although I am still on bedrest, it’s not as strict this go around. J takes me out to eat to celebrate. We are over halfway through this pregnancy so now the doctor just wants to make sure I don’t go into pre-term labor.
“What about Lexi?” J asks as we wait for our food to arrive.
“No, I don’t think she’s a Lexi.”
We toss names back and forth throughout lunch, but none of them sound perfect for our daughter.
“Emma is a pretty name,” J says after thinking for a couple of minutes.
I shake my head again, not liking it when the perfect name comes to mind. “Ella Jane,” I say proudly.
J smiles. “I love it, Cass. My mom is going to be so happy when she finds out.”
“When do you want to tell them we have picked out a name?”
“Whenever is fine with me.”
“I’d like to tell them tonight if that’s okay. I’m a little excited.”
“I can see that,” he replies laughingly.
As Ella’s due date grows closer, the more uncomfortable I feel. I can hardly sleep and nausea has returned with a vengeance. There has been no drama since the night Heather sent me the pictures. I don’t know what Heather was thinking, but her plan obviously was a bust.
“You look beautiful, baby,” J croons, spinning me around one time before tugging me against him. Tonight, I am wearing a dress for the first time in ages. J is taking me out for what might be our last date night for a while. I have a feeling we will be a family of three here soon.
“I feel like a whale,” I whine. Okay, so maybe I don’t look like one, but I feel huge.
“I love you being pregnant,” he admits.
If I am honest, I like being pregnant. Except for the nausea and vomiting, that I can do without. “Maybe we can have one more in the future.”
“Three.”
“One.”
“Two.”
“Deal,” I concede.
“Let’s go to dinner.”
“Wait, I need to pee.” J’s laughter follows me down the hall as I head to the bathroom. He’s probably remembering the time I peed all over myself because Ella stepped on my bladder. Thankfully, we were just in the yard and not out in public.
I’ve been hurting all day, but I haven’t told J that yet. The contractions have steadily been getting stronger as the day wears on which is starting to worry me.
I freeze and then scream for J when I notice the blood in my panties. I guess it’s time for baby girl to make her appearance.
I’ve always been an easy going kind of guy with a lot of patience. Then Cassie came along and suddenly my patience evaporated. It became very thin. From wanting to see her and talk to her every free moment I had and even during some moments when I am supposed to be concentrating on something important. Her parents are partly to blame for my patience running out for not letting me spend more than one whole day with her. I’m a guy who fell in love with a girl who stole my breath from me each time my eyes landed on her. I grew hungry for her attention and desperate for her kiss.
Whoever said love was easy, well, they lied. In some ways, it is easy, simple. When you start adding curveballs is when it becomes tricky. Love can be pure, whole, and even rugged. Everyone views love differently, but it’s who you love and how you love that makes a difference. Cassie and I fit perfectly with one another. She was the missing puzzle piece, the guidance I didn’t know I needed.
Even now, with Cassie trying her hardest to bring our daughter into the world, she is still clothed with beauty. And I am impatiently awaiting the arrival of my daughter.
“Come on, baby, she’s almost here,” I encourage her. Cassie is gripping my hand to point of breaking it and she’s exhausted. Sweat coats her hair and body, but she doesn’t quit. How she is doing this with no epidural is beyond me.
When my daughter’s cries fill the room, I am brought to tears. Once I cut the umbilical cord, Ella is placed on Cassie’s chest. Leaning down so I can admire my six pounds, ten-ounce baby girl, I wrap my arms around both my girls. “You did so good, Cass,” I say, kissing her feverishly.
“We did good,” she corrects.
Our family moment only lasted a minute before they take Ella to give her a bath, instructing me to come along. Once she is all cleaned and bundled up, I snap a picture of her to send to my parents, Bo, and Jess who are all waiting to meet her.
The second I am able to, I bring Ella back to Cassie. She is sitting up in the bed, her hair pulled back in a messy bun.
I place Ella in Cassie’s arms and sit next to her on the bed, which is not very comfortable. My arm snakes around her, getting as close as I can.
“I think she looks so much like you, J,” Cassie says.
“Of course she would inherit my good looks,” I tease. “I do see some of you in her too. Ella has your cheeks and lips, Cass,” I point out.
It isn’t long before Mom, Dad, Bo, and Jess swarm us, all wanting to hold Ella very badly. Mom and Dad have first rights as grandparents. Bo pulled the Uncle card and held her next. Finally, Jess gets her turn and then she is back in my arms again.
As I cuddle my daughter close to my chest, a knock sounds on the door. “Come in,” I call.
When the girl walks in, I can’t help but glare at her. “What are you doing here, Heather?” Of all people, she is the last person I expected to show up at the hospital.
Cradled in her arms is her son. He is shielded by a baby blue blanket with his name embroidered on one corner that reads, Carson Wayne.
She starts to step forward but stops. Heather is showing me a side of her I haven’t seen before. She seems scared, hesitant.
“You can sit down,” I tell her, pointing to the empty chair.
“She’s beautiful, Cassie,” she comments and I thank her, waiting for her to get to the reason why she is here. Heather has tried to come between J and me on more than one occasion so it’s no secret I don’t like her. As a matter of fact, I can’t stand her. “I came to apologize for going after J. Going after something I can’t have is what I have always done, it was what my parents taught me, although, I guess they were meaning something different than I took it.”
It took a lot of guts for her to come here and say she is sorry. I can tell she is sincere and I hope things work out for her in the future. “Thank you for apologizing. Your son is going to be a very handsome fella when he gets older.”
There is a distant look in her eyes. “Yeah, he looks exactly like his father.”
“I don’t mean to pry, but who is his father? You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, I am just curious.”
She gazes down at her bundle of joy. “I hope you don’t think badly of me when I tell you.” I don’t know why I would think badly of her. The baby is obviously not J’s so I don’t have a reason to be upset with her. “Zack is the father,” she admits.
My jaw drops, but I quickly close it. “Wow. I would have never guessed Zack. Does he know?”
“After Ellen died, he started saying all the right things to me and one thing led to another. And then he got locked up and I found out I was pregnant. I went to visit him at the prison after I found out and he didn’t believe the baby was his.” She stops to wipe away a tear. “I went back and let him see Carson thinking that once he sees him, he will see the resemblance. Zack still wanted a paternity test done so I got it done and when the results came back I took it to him to prove he indeed was Carson’s f
ather. He claimed he would help as much as he could, but I told him not to worry about it. Carson would be grown before Zack would even step foot outside the jail. When my son is old enough, I will tell him about his father and he would have to decide for himself if he wants to see him.”
Heather is in tears now. Her situation is hard, but she is doing the right thing for her son. Holding my arm out to her, I offer a hug. She is still hesitant but accepts my hug anyway. “I forgive you, Heather. Carson is lucky to have you as a mother.” I may not like her, but I do have a heart and being a single mother will be hard for her.
“Cassie?” J questions as she walks in.
Heather pulls away and wipes her tears. I myself have to wipe away a couple of my own tears. Bo and J glance between Heather and I with curious stares.
“I guess I’m going to head out. Thanks for listening, Cassie.” She heads for the door and stops in front of J. “I’m sorry for everything, J. I would list all of my mistakes, but I’d be standing here for a while.”
J nods once. “Apology accepted.”
Heather leaves, closing the door behind her. J walks to the side of the bed, leans down and kisses my forehead before taking Ella from my arms.
“Zack is the father,” I announce. Bo and J just stare at me. “It shocked me too, but she said that he isn’t going to be in his son’s life unless Carson chooses to see him. I think she made the right choice.”
Bo and J agree. As a mother, I would want to protect my child and not force her to see her father if she doesn’t want to. Fortunately for me, I don’t have to worry about J not being in Ella’s life. Ella already has J wrapped around her tiny finger.
Watching J with Ella is mesmerizing. My heart wants to burst from so much happiness. J cuddles her close to his chest, her tiny hand is still latched on to his finger, showing no signs of letting go.
Life is perfect.
J and I couldn’t be more excited to bring Ella home with us today. She looks so snug bundled up in her pink and black polka dot car seat. “She’s so beautiful, J. I can’t take my eyes off of her.” I’m riding in the backseat next to my daughter, admiring her.